Last few weeks, my kiddo has started a new tradition – playing “Ludo” before we go to bed. And, for last few weeks those 20 minutes has been the best time of the day that I spend – not thinking – just enjoying with my 2 princesses.
Things have not been how I wanted them to be for a long time, but last few weeks that has been changing and things are taking a favorable shape. Yet, I feel myself still being restless. When I am alone – driving or working or doing something alone, I just can not get my “tunnel focus” back. I am just unable to keep the distress signals out of picture and just focus on getting the things done that need doing. I have been spending a lot of energy in trying to keep myself on track (for doing whatever I have to do). For some reason, I don’t know why?
And, this brings me back to introspection and I am trying to relate my entire day, last few weeks to those 20 minutes I spend where I am totally focused and not worried about whats happening around me or with me. All I know that those 20 minutes make me happy like nothing else does and I need to find that love again in what I do. Also, that my family is with me during that time enjoying and supporting me makes a huge difference to me and I look forward to doing that.
It will not be wrong to summarize that both of the following statements are true for me:
My life’s moments are incomplete, they are not in the same vicinity as complete, if I can not share them with my family.
There are things I need to do; not for someone else but for myself. My urge to stay hungry is the reason I am alive.
I don’t have all the answers. I failed as much as I have succeeded. But, I have not failed enough just as I have not succeeded enough.
Two months back when I came back to India, little I knew that my life would take a U-turn for good. Everything that has happened since July 26 is a welcome surprise. And, it all started with my leadership to decide to allocate me to a project. Next few weeks unfolded very differently
I was told that there is a possibility I would be sent on bench if no suitable project was found for me;
I was awarded IMPax award which meant I was recognized by the CTO of the organization for my work towards the Java Technology
I was told by “the director” who leads Architects in India that I am not skilled enough to be an Architect
On the other side, I was making super-duper progress on my personal front and within a few weeks of my arrival back to India I had achieved:
Learnt PHP and WordPress and moved my websites/blogs to self-managed hosted environment;
Gave share to my iFramework so that it can be shared with a community bigger than any organization (open source community)
I finally released my project to OSS community as a Maven Central Project
DZone selected me as one of their Most Valuable Blogger – which meant they would publish my articles on their JavaLobby
I started to work on the “Testing Framework” that was Work In Progress for last 3 years and finally I gave it shape that i can be released as a framework
Even purchased domain for it: EAMSteps.org
Wrote a Multi-threading framework
On personal side, some things started to change and in all this mix I realized one thing – I had lost my touch on technology during last thre years and all this happened because a laid-back attitude that I had developed. Now, that for 6 weeks I was so active which was hard to believe, it seemed appropriate to continue with the momentum and it was time to do things that matter.
Last 3 years made me realize that age is catching up with me and if I do not do something substantial soon, it will be too late. I would have another 2 (maybe 3) years to make a significant impact on my career.
Amongst all of the changes, it became evident that it was time to move on from my current organization and figure out whats next. And, here I am now just looking at another month maybe 5 weeks with my current organization and still figuring out whats the next best thing to do for me to make the very best use of next few years of my professional life.
[quote]Do not go where the path may lead; go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.[/quote]
For almost 3 years I have been thinking about launching my own website, but it was supposed to be now. It seems that I have taken a 180-degree turn for the good since I have been back in India. I have started at least 6 initiatives in office and personal life and I have been working hard to achieve all of those. Moving all my personal data to a hosted and self-managed domain is just one of them. And here you see the fruits of my hard labor showing up.
This blog is just one of 5 web sites that I am launching today. The others are:
Kapil Viren Ahuja – a quick peek into who I am. This is just a beginning and I will add more details to this in coming months about my family, career etc.
Gallery – this will host a collection of pictures related to major events that happen in my life. I will try to add details of past events too but I promise myself to add albums as new things unfold (if you see not much things here, be patient)
Scratch Pad – This is going to my official technical website from now onwards. This name stuck with me many years back and I have kept it so. This website will be an anchor to all the things I have done and I will do in technology
Projects – I have worked on numerous projects in my entire career, and most of them have been built on top of frameworks and utilities I have taken from the community. This website will host details of all those projects and my effort to give it back to the community.
I want to thank you all in reading my blogs in the past and encouraging me to take it to the next level. My previous two blogs will remain as is for all those users who do not wish to change their bookmarks. They will have excerpts form my new website.